Prologue: I thought about writing a review of Heretic, the new A24 movie with Hugh Grant playing an eloquent “um Ackshually” guy taking two Mormon missionaries captive, and tying it in with some larger comments on A24 movies in general, but instead the following 2,000 words will deal with a pointless diatribe about the Jake Paul/Tyson fight and myContinue reading “november 19, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
Tag Archives: alcohol
october 22, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
I’ve noticed a recurring tendency with these posts: I feel a strange allegiance to being negative. I’ll go to write something, anything, and it almost always feels too positive to be worth sharing. With everything going on in the world, and the title of this “project,” whatever that word “project” means, I often feel like I need to be excavatingContinue reading “october 22, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
october 2, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
I’m a day late, according to an arbitrary schedule I came up with myself, but usually treat as absolute. Extremes are kind of my thing, and my tendency for the all-or-nothing has helped as much as harmed me. Roughly three years ago, I was in Denver with Stove. I wrote a few weeks ago about the time myContinue reading “october 2, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
september 24, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
I wonder often about what I could be if I just got out of my own damn way. My bad habits have ranged over the years from innocuous to injurious, from seductive to sad. I’m going on two months of not biting my fingernails, for example. Aside from an extra cold now and then and the stigmaContinue reading “september 24, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
september 10, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
This week marks the three-year anniversary of the closest I’ve ever come to dying (as far as I know). Dying is a great reason to do things. It lends a sense of urgency where otherwise, were time unlimited, it would be easy to be complacent. Want to write songs? Stories? Do it—you could be deadContinue reading “september 10, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
august 6, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
It feels like the world has a head cold. Nothing serious, but a constant, slow drip. You dreamt of floods and you drive in rain, and you can’t get the right wiper speed without the plastic blades whimpering against the glass, but your music is just right. The world outside is wet but the rainContinue reading “august 6, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
july 2 – performative journaling at the End of the world
Nothing screams America like explosions in the sky. Friday. $4 Coors Light, a beautiful night, a nice walk down to see some fireworks. But then Toby Keith had to go and ruin it. Maddy and I were standing in this “beer garden” cordoned off by orange temporary construction fencing. We had walked down to thisContinue reading “july 2 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
june 18, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
I found my first gray hair yesterday. They’ve been in my beard for years, but this is the first one to grow out of my head. And it’s all Bruce Springsteen’s fault. After sustained and enthusiastic recommendation by one of my good friends, I finally tried out the ’78 album Darkness at the Edge of Town, andContinue reading “june 18, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
june 11, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world
Sunday, I was hungover. This is no surprise. Many Sundays have begun that way for me. It was nothing I hadn’t experienced before: waking up and having just a moment or two of no pain, before I started feeling blood pound in my temples, and my head started to throb, and nausea settled in. Typically,Continue reading “june 11, 2024 – performative journaling at the End of the world”
matt nilsen 